I feel honored to be able to present the following ‘From a Mother’. The following text was written by a very dedicated mother about her son who I had the good fortune of working with. It is also followed by a poem that she wrote
which I believe speaks for itself.
It became apparent to me that this family needed to become the support system that was required after my treatment ended. This was necessary because they did not have the financial
resources to engage in this very important part of treatment. It became obvious that this system could be utilized by many other families who do not have the financial resources to support follow up treatment.
From a Mother
Jack Rosberg, Psychologist, made contact with my son within 5 minutes of meeting him. He has now known him for 2 weeks and has spent 4 or 6 hours a day with him (approximately 50 hours) and the change to my son, in that short time, is remarkable.
Jack has also shown myself and all the family how to support my son when he returns to the US.
We are a very carrying family who would do anything to help our son/brother but until Jack and his wife, Ann came to this country
we were not making a lot of headway.
My son was grossly traumatized (sexually, physically and mentally abused) over a long period of time. It seems impossible that, although he had behavioural changes during that time, I, in
my naivety, attributed these to his adolescence. Eventually he ended up in the psychiatric system. When he told them briefly how he felt they told him he was ill and gave him the label of “schizophrenia.” When he replied
“I’m not ill” they said he was delusional which, they said was a symptom of “schizophrenia.” They prescribed a large dose of major tranquilizers and I was told not to cause him any stress and to let him give up everything including
his hobbies. Thinking the psychiatrists knew best, I did as I was asked. Because they said my son had an “illness” I did not investigate his behaviour further and the abusers were free to carry on. My son was then left
with a sense of hopelessness and his behaviour deteriorated. I was led to believe that this further deterioration was part of the “illness”. Finally my son had nothing else in his life apart from the abuse.
all the time my son has been in the psychiatric system (18 years) no one in the National Health Service has made real contact with him and as Jack says, if you don’t make that contact with a person, they won’t listen to you and forming a
relationship is impossible. Thus time is wasted.
Gradually we found out from our son and daughter (who had also been abused) what had happened to them and so, instead of dealing with the unacceptable manners and behaviour my
son displayed we attributed it to incidents in the past and excused it, instead of helping our son to deal with it and consequently feel better about himself.
Thanks to Jack Rosberg who has already started attacking the behaviour,
our son feels better about himself and is slowly gaining self respect.
There is still quite a long way to go but we know now that we are on the right track and all members of the family have been given roles to engage with our
son/brother. We feel sure that, under the guidance of Jack Rosberg, a very kind, patient, sensitive, yet firm psychologist, a person who really cares for his fellow man and his suffering, other families could become the support team
for their loved ones.
They walk around in their coats of white
These learnèd men, they must be right.
What they’ve been taught and the books they’ve read
There’s so much knowledge in each head.
The patient can’t complain if not treated right
‘Cos he’s a psychotic with ‘no insight’.
Even if he’s a passenger in a car that’s crashed
And unfortunately his leg is smashed
And he sees the doctor ‘cos he feels so ill.
What response does he get, “Are you taking your pill?”
I know a learnèd man also
The patient he’s seeing, he does not know.
But from the others, what sets this man apart
Is the fact that this person thinks with his heart.
He’s no need to wear a badge and white coat.
He’s no need to flick through a file for some quotes.
He comes as he is, this man, I say;
No preconceived thoughts, no notes tucked away.
He sees this young man who’s inward and sad.
He doesn’t think he’s mad or bad.
He sees a young man who is clever and kind.
To reach him is all he has on his mind.
In two weeks he reaches beyond the fear
What the others have missed for nineteen years.
And now this young man’s taken steps on his way
To fulfilling his dreams, which he will, one day.
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