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Living
with schizophrenia, along with a lot of fear and
anxiety was more than I had bargained for. Most of
my childhood and adulthood I suffered with the
symptoms of schizophrenia. It has been a real
challenge to overcome. But the great news is this,
one can overcome!
It is my honest belief that when I turned my
situation over to someone greater than myself, began
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and changed my way of
thinking, I began my journey into recovery. I
learned that I was not the center of the universe
when it came to my diagnoses. So I began to learn
empathy towards others instead of only centering on
myself. I learned through therapy that I am a person
of great worth and that I had something to offer the
world that no one else could bring quiet the same
way as I could. I learned that my past does not say
who I am or who I will become in the future. I am
the author of my life’s story and it is only through
me that I am able to write it as I see fit. I can
either choose unhappiness or I can choose to be
joyful and overcome any hardship that presents
itself. I am not saying one can simply wake up one
morning and choose to have a sound mind. It takes a
lot of work. It takes commitment and perseverance.
In therapy, I learned to be committed to getting
better and I persevered until one day I realized I
did have a sound mind and I did have a choice in the
direction my life was taking me. Cognitive
Behavioral Therapy taught me to change the way I was
thinking. I was once a very negative person, not
ever seeing a way out of my dilemma. But today, I am
extremely optimistic, it has become my way of life,
my way of thinking and responding to the world
around me.
After many, many years of suffering with extreme
anxiety due to the symptoms of the schizophrenia I
can honestly say that I no longer experience any
anxiety to speak of. I was recently invited to join
the Speakers Bureau in Oklahoma and become a public
speaker on schizophrenia, stigma and recovery. When
asked, I wanted to run away and hide, but only for a
moment. My new way of training my mind to think was
beginning to pay off. I said yes to the offer and
today I have spoken to hundreds of people all over
southwest Oklahoma. My new goal and dream is to
speak publicly all over the United States. Now
that’s a big dream I realize….but people do it every
day, and I am not any different than anyone else
when it comes to my ability to succeed. I love my
new job almost as much as I love having a sound
mind.
Today, I would like to encourage everyone to reach
out, stretch yourself a little further, commit to
therapy, change your thinking patterns and once and
for all, embrace your recovery. You’ve heard the old
saying, “Heal thyself”? Well, it has been my
experience that indeed I had to take charge over my
own healing. I had a lot of help from people who
care about me and believe in me, but ultimately it
was up to me to choose to commit and persevere until
I did recover.
You are a person of worth, you have a story to tell
and your future is one of hope. Take hold of the
dream, shape it, mold it and then share it with the
world. No one else’s story is quiet the same as
yours, you are authentically unique. There is no
reason to fear recovery in your future because you
already know, deep within you, who you truly are.
Remember, everything you learn and everything you
say and do is uniquely you, there is no other you.
Saying positive affirmations are a part of my life,
so I leave you with this scripture that has become a
daily reminder to me.
“ God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of
power, love and of a sound mind”.
(2 Timothy 1:7)
I look forward to any and all correspondence.
Bartlett.kim79@yahoo.com
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